How did you decide to write your book, Love Defined?
I honestly had no intention of writing another book. I had just self-published my book “From Stumbling Blocks to Stepping Stones” in 2021. The impetus for writing “Love Defined came about in a unique way. As I was praying one morning, I asked God if there was anything I needed to focus on. I sensed Him saying, “My love for you and humankind.” Then, I heard in my spirit, “Love Defined will be the title of your next book.” My first thought was, “How could I possibly write a book about God’s love for humankind?” I am not an authority on God’s love, although I have experienced it many times and in many ways. So, there was no real decision. It was an act of obedience and trust that God would lead and guide me in the writing of this book.
Lectio Divina is the focal point. Could you give a brief description of its meaning?
Lectio Divina is the Latin term for “divine reading”. It is an ancient contemplative Christian practice used to pray with the Scriptures. The format has been traced back to the 12th century French monk, Guigo, who outlined Lectio Divina’s four steps in his book called the “Ladder of Monks”. The four steps are: Lectio (reading); Meditatio (meditation); Oratio (conversing with God); and Contemplatio (sitting in God’s presence). The steps are designed to be fluid as the reader listens to, reflects on and responds to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. It is simply one way of listening to and hearing from God.
How can anyone know for sure that God loves unconditionally?
When I was in my early twenties, I read C.S. Lewis’ book entitled “The Four Loves”. In his book, he describes four types of love: storge (affection); philia (friendship); eros (romantic); and agape (charity). I became fascinated by the concept of agape love, an unconditional love as described in 1 Corinthians 13. I just knew in my heart that God’s love for me was an agape love. How could it not be? Put your name in the blank. “For God so loved _______ that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16) He sacrificed His own Son for you and me. One of my friends told me once that she knew that God loved her on an intellectual basis, but she didn’t know it in her heart for many years. It wasn’t until she asked God to show her His unconditional love for her that she had an amazing experience of His love. If you’re not sure of God’s unconditional love, I encourage you to ask Him to show you just how much He loves you, and to read His Word and personalize the many, many verses of His love for you.
Your description of your dog Halo is touching. Is it possible for humans to develop such a relationship with God?
Absolutely! God desires a relationship with each one of us. Like every other relationship in your life, it is a process. Building a relationship with God is a work of the heart. When we seek God with our whole heart and are honest with Him about our desires and intentions, even if they are not where we want them to be, God will meet us right where we are. Simply ask God to help you develop a heart for Him; for the desire to learn about who He is through His Word. Read about the life of Jesus through the Gospel stories and take note of how He treats people; what He says and does; and how He interacts with difficult situations. Invite God into every aspect and decision of your day – walk with Him – and when you sense Him speaking to you, listen and do what He says. For example, it could be that His Word is letting you know there is a relationship in your life that needs forgiveness. As you walk with God, seek His guidance and direction, and follow through on what He is saying to you, you will build trust. Trust is critical to the deepening of any relationship, and it is no different with God. As you walk through the seasons of your life, trusting and depending on Him, your relationship will deepen accordingly.
You liken God to a gardener. Could you explain that?
Think of someone in your life who is a gardener. My dad was a true gardener. The first thing he did when he got home from work was change into his gardening clothes and head outside to his flower garden. He spent time … observing … nurturing … pruning … and caring for each plant. He weeded, watered, and watched to ensure those plants had the best growing environment. That’s how I see God. He is always waiting for me to turn to Him so that He can nurture me with His Word, guide Me in the way I should go, take all my burdens on His shoulders, and help me to persevere through the difficulties of life. Like my dad’s passion for his gardens, God has a passionate love for each one of us.
Your book shows your intimacy with God. Did you find the process daunting?
Over many years I have been consciously and deliberately working on my relationship with God, but it wasn’t until I entered a difficult season in our family’s life that God led me to a deeper level of intimacy with Him. I was in a position where I had no control over my situation; I had to depend on God fully. Just before that season began, I went to a weekend seminar on how to hear God’s voice. Learning to hear God’s voice through the reading of scripture transformed my relationship with Him. It was during this time that I began to journal. As I read and reflected on His Word, I would begin to sense Him speaking right into the circumstances of my life. Because I needed Him so much, I began to tell him my thoughts and fears throughout the day, to invite Him into my decisions and to ask for His peace. During that time, He would bring people into my life to guide me when fear and despair threatened to overwhelm me. He connected with me in so many different ways – always letting me know that He was right there – that I could trust Him as I followed His guidance and direction. I found myself looking to Him, speaking to Him and resting in His presence. He became, for me, a true loving Father.
What advice would you give to someone longing for that same intimacy?
Be real with God. He is your Father and He loves you very much – even if you cannot “feel” it right now. He wants to be intimately involved in your life. Take a chance and let Him in. Be intentional about spending time in His presence, somewhere where there are no distractions. Don’t be afraid of silence; He wants you to come, sit quietly, and spend time with Him.
The question you may be asking yourself is, “How do I get into His presence?” Great question. Let me tell you the ways that help me the most. One of the first things I do when I want to get into the presence of God is breathe. I take long deep breaths to calm my mind and body. Sometimes, I whisper “Holy, Holy, Holy” as I breathe in and out. Then I give Him thanks. God’s Word says that we can enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. I take time to reflect on what is going on in my life and offer up thanks to Him. I will often verbally praise Him for who He is or sometimes play a praise and worship song.
Then I read His Word slowly … not to gain knowledge … but to listen to what He wants to say to me that day. When I come to a word or phrase that strikes me, I stop and just ponder that word in my heart. I wait to see if I sense whether God is directing me to do something or if it is a word of encouragement for a situation that I am in.
Sometimes, I use the practice of imaginative prayer. As I read a story in one of the Gospels, I place myself as a character somewhere in the story. This can be a powerful experience as I have often sensed Jesus speaking directly to me.
Over the course of the day, I speak with God … ask Him questions … ask for help and give Him thanks. I love walking my dog in the fields and just thanking Him for His beautiful creation.
Sometimes, I stop during the busyness of the day and just breathe while repeating a short verse of scripture like “Be still, and know that I am God;” (Psalm 46:10a) It takes only a minute, but you will be surprised how it brings you back into the presence of God in a very real way.
I hope these suggestions help you to find intimacy with God.